- invention of the light bulb
- video games can be good for you
- tech has made life so much easyier
(easy access to information-at your finger tips)
teis: from the invention of the first light bulb to the revoltionary ipod we have been thorugh alot of chnages that has made our lifes easier an more productive with the help of tech.
Pharagraph 1
for me to be a gamer i have notice that some games can teach people things
- "call of duty 1&2 shows the WW1 & 2 through the game you play as a soldier going into battle
Pharagraph 2
the progress of tech is only going to get better so we should just use it until we run out of ideas
- light bulb
- ipod
pharagraph 3
with the help of tech our lifes have been easier we can look up anything we want online we can even learn online now
- our lifes revolve around tech now but all it takes is a hiking trip to notice life with out it
pharagraph 4
- we buy the new version of things that looks cooler but it does the same thing as the last it makes no sense
conclusion
kevin. your main ideas are good. in your outline you should include what quotes or evidence you should use
ReplyDeleteI thought your thesis was pretty good but not great because anybody could have made that up themselves. You should revise your thesis and just make it sound more smart.
ReplyDeleteIn paragraph one i think you should explain how does games make you better and include quotes or some kind of evidence to guide you.
You should do the same for the rest of the paragraphs and really explain in depth about the situation with technology and how it makes our lives much easier.